bingo_mcdingo: A Very 21st Century Dilemma

Bingo McDingo (

bingo_mcdingo) wrote,
@ 2007-10-19 14:30:00

A Very 21st Century Dilemma
Today is Ned's 5th Birthday. I'm celebrating that I've managed to raise a child for five years without losing, selling or permanently damaging him. Actually, scrub that last one, as time will tell regarding the psychological damage.

Anyway, the Lovely Mrs. McDingo had seen how much fun Ned had had playing with his cousin's toy pirate ship, and thought it would be a good idea to get him something similar. A quick check on e-bay later, and we'd found the perfect item - a 'Pirate Island' playset, with real firing cannon. Well, obviously not real, otherwise we'd be subject to weapons inspections and stuff, but real toy firing cannons, and harpoons and all sorts.

She found this just as the bid was ending - literally with about 3 minutes to go, so we put in a speculative bid, pretty low.

And we won.

See.... here

So, it cost us the grand price of £2.20, plus £4 postage and packing. £6.20 to have a fantastic playset delivered to our door.

The seller was really good, kept us informed, and the parcel arrived this morning, Ned's birthday, at 7:30 - a proper foot square parcel for him to open.

However, I couldn't help but notice that the cost of postage alone had been £8. Seeing as how we won at £2.20 and paid £4 postage, it means the poor guy was £1.80 down on the deal before taking the packing into account.

As soon as she realised this, the lovely Mrs. McDingo suggested that we contact the bloke and pay him the difference, so that he's not out of pocket. My initial reaction was, well, it was his mistake so we're not liable, but that's why Mrs McDingo is the lovely Mrs. McDingo, and why I'm just a scumball. I mean, it's only a couple of quid, and it's a nice gesture, but would it be patronising? Or are we rewarding a mistake, and if we pay him extra, he won't learn from it?

What would you do?

(Post a new comment)

	offensive_mango 2007-10-19 01:41 pm UTC (link)
	I'd personally contact him and offer to pay the difference. He'll still learn from it :) I think postage rates changing recently could account for his not mistake. (Reply to this)(Thread)

	offensive_mango 2007-10-19 01:41 pm UTC (link)
	His mistake. Not his "not mistake." (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	bingo_mcdingo 2007-10-19 01:52 pm UTC (link)
	But would I be making him feel stupid for not calculating properly in the first place? Would he think I was offering charity? It's such a minefield! (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	offensive_mango 2007-10-19 01:54 pm UTC (link)
	If he is going to feel stupid for not calculating properly, he already does. Would you personally see it as charity? I'd just see it as someone being very very nice. It is, of course, up to you--it's a small enough amount that it probably doesn't really matter. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	bingo_mcdingo 2007-10-19 01:57 pm UTC (link)
	It's the curse of the middle classes - I'm agonising over every decision and am probably rapidly turning into David Mitchell. OK. I shall be decisive, and contact the chap this evening. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	mockduck 2007-10-19 02:09 pm UTC (link)
	I have been in his shoes before, when I couldn't be arsed to weigh a book I was selling. I would have been very gratified by the offer, I think. (Reply to this)(Thread)

	bingo_mcdingo 2007-10-19 02:11 pm UTC (link)
	I've done it myself too, and that's part of the reason why I'm reticent about offering to pay the difference... I'm not sure what the etiquette is - nobody offered to reimburse me, and I bet that they didn't offer to reimburse you. But is that enough reason not to do a nice thing? (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	mockduck 2007-10-19 02:33 pm UTC (link)
	You're right, they didn't, and I fumed about it a bit, but only to myself. Yeah, go and do a random act of kindness. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	lurpak 2007-10-19 02:39 pm UTC (link)
	I would offer anyway, I don't think it'd be patronising. He's been nice and helpful throughout and posted promptly, etc. What a great bargain btw! (Reply to this)(Thread)

bingo_mcdingo
2007-10-19 02:48 pm UTC (link)

I think you're right - the fact that he posted promptly so that it arrived on Ned's birthday is something I'm grateful for (even if it was partly out of his control), so even just as a thank you gesture, I think I should refund the balance.

And yes, isn't it! Sometimes I just love e-bay. However, in true little boy style, Ned's younger brother managed to break one of the oars before going to school which caused a degree of consternation (which of course means wailing like it's the end of the world). Thank heavens for superglue.

(Reply to this)(Parent)

	new_brunette 2007-10-19 02:41 pm UTC (link)
	I probably wouldn't be arsed to do it myself, but if I was nudged into it by a morally superior being, I guess I'd feel I should. And I wonder whether you've been more psychologically scarred by Ned than he has by you. (Reply to this)(Thread)

bingo_mcdingo
2007-10-19 02:46 pm UTC (link)

By morally superior, do you mean female? I've noticed that all the advocates for being kind for the sake of being kind have been female, while you've espoused my own position clearly and concisely. Probably wouldn't be arsed is the phrase that sums up my own position.

In answer to your second point, undoubtedly. Which is why I'm working so hard on screwing him up now!

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

new_brunette
2007-10-19 02:48 pm UTC (link)

Morally superior: you might very well think that. I couldn't possibly comment.

On screwing up children: I was reminded by

idiot27, my best man, that he took inspiration for child rearing from me. To whit: reminding a three year old that if naughty boys don't go to bed when they're told, the hall monster who lives under the stairs comes out to eat them.

Worked, though.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

bingo_mcdingo
2007-10-19 03:00 pm UTC (link)

I'm sure I read this on LJ sometime in the past, but it was a parent who couldn't get their little boy out of the bath - he just loved splashing and playing and refused to come out. So they told him that the gurgling in the plughole was a monster (whose name was something wonderful like 'The Tommysplodger or something) who was shouting becuase he could taste little boys in the water and wanted to come up and eat him.

It worked, but too well, and they couldn't then get the boy back in the bath because he was terrified of being sucked down the plughole and devoured.

Now that's my kind of parenting,, which is why I approve wholeheartedly of hall monsters!

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	new_brunette 2007-10-19 03:06 pm UTC (link)
	The water tastes of little boys? Wow. That's fucking great! (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	bingo_mcdingo 2007-10-19 03:09 pm UTC (link)
	Inspired, I thought! (Reply to this)(Parent)

jerusalem66
2007-10-19 04:29 pm UTC (link)

I'd probably mail the guy saying thanks for the nice item, etc. and then point out that the postage was a wee bit higher than he'd quoted, and query whether that was the case. If he mailed back and it was the case, I'd be more than happy to make up the difference considering how whizzo the pirate set was. If he said it was cool all the same, I'd probably send him the difference anyway, citing my grey-haired old mother brought me up that way (and obviously not citing I'm a nice guy and all that ;) ).
And if there was no reply... I'd let it ride and forget about it - you were honest and nothing was said, so that's a free half at the boozer and a neat toy for the little chap. Win/win and no embarassment there!

(Reply to this)

	ratphooey 2007-10-20 05:52 am UTC (link)
	I'd pay him the difference. (Reply to this)(Thread)

	bingo_mcdingo 2007-10-20 09:16 am UTC (link)
	I did in the end, based on the advice I got here. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	ratphooey 2007-10-20 12:42 pm UTC (link)
	Seems fair. (Reply to this)(Parent)

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